1) There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don’t.
2) If at first you don’t succeed; call it version 1.0
3) My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
4) Roses are #FF0000
Violets are #0000FF
All my base
Are belong to you.
5) Microsoft: “You’ve got questions. We’ve got dancing paperclips.”
6) I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
7) The box said, “Requires Windows 95 or better.” So I installed Linux.
8) In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
9) Hand over the calculator, friends don’t let friends derive drunk.
10) You know it’s love when you memorize her IP number to skip DNS overhead.
11) Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny.
12) Linux, DOS and Windows…the good, the bad and the ugly.
13) Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
14) How do I set a laser printer to stun?
15) Failure is not an option — it comes bundled with Windows.
16) People say that if you play Microsoft CD’s backwards, you hear satanic things, but that’s nothing, because if you play them forwards, they install Windows.
17) Windows had detected you do not have a keyboard. Press “F9” to continue.
18) Beware of computer programmers that carry screwdrivers.
19) SELECT * FROM users WHERE clue > 0
– returned 0 results
20) There is no place like 127.0.0.1